Commentary by Jan Keller: From fairy tale to fairy tale

Jan Keller - casopisargument.cz

Keller without censorship: today Jan Keller writes about the fact that thanks to our politicians in the Czech Republic we live like in a fairy tale...

Opinions may vary on how we live in our increasingly beautiful country. Others will prevail in Prague and others in the rest of the country, i.e. in the countryside. Different views will be held by people who, with their friends, are secure in well-paid jobs, and different views will be held by people standing at the overloaded counters of social welfare offices. However, we could all agree that we are living like a fairy tale here.

At least the politicians' performances increasingly resemble the most mythical and incredible fairy tales. The freshest yet came from Interior Minister Vít Rakušan (STAN), when he publicly declared that he had an encrypted phone of the same type used by a certain group under investigation for committing crimes at home so that his children would have something to play with. So far he has not responded to the questions of readers who took his statement quite seriously: 'Did Gazdík's children, Polčák's children, Redl's children and other small mafia members have the same toy? And what did those little rascals write down?" All this and much more can be read in the discussions below the minister's statement. Once we immerse ourselves in the world of fairy tales, we may begin to wonder what the children of members of the General Staff of the army or the little ones in the homes of members of the Mordtarpatta, a police department dedicated to solving murders, may be playing with at home.

The interior minister is far from the only member of the government who enjoys telling fairy tales. The one from the Prime Minister of the ODS is very nice. Dear children, within ten years we will make our schools centres of learning that will be the envy of the world. We will start by abolishing the prescribed standards for the number of toilets. It has been scientifically proven that pupils who use the toilets during lessons miss out on a lot of information and underperform in politics. I, for example, always made it to recess, and if I didn't, I just sent the signal. Of course, my Government is taking a systemic approach, which is why we will reduce the number of cooks in schools. If pupils cannot eat in school canteens, one of the reasons for going to the toilet in the first place will disappear.

A charming story by the Minister of Industry and Trade Jozef Sikely (STAN) is perfect for long winter evenings, telling how our German neighbours are shutting down their factories and other useless operations as the hard frosts arrive, so that our hands don't get sore knitting sweaters at home in Bohemia.

For the little ones, the entire series of bachelor tales by Foreign Minister Jan Lipavský (Pirates) is intended. In them we find ourselves in a world of eternal peace without any fights and quarrels. Wars and strife disappeared as if by magic right after all states decided to sharply increase their military spending, modernize the most devastating weapons, mobilize all the fighting men (not referring to foreign ministers) and move their military bases as close as possible to the borders of former adversaries. Nine out of ten military experts recommend telling this bedtime story to soothe children.

Generally popular are also the tales about falling prices, about the successful fight against inflation, about the excellent transport infrastructure of our country, about the unusually advantageous purchase of military aircraft, but also about the eternally misguided populists and the always principled democrats, about the completely green destiny that will come to us in a magical electric car, or perhaps about the good pro-government truth-telling media and the evil and lying alternative media.

Probably the shortest and by far the most successful of all fairy tales for adults is the one about the castle. It is ruled by a wise monarch surrounded by good advisors. That's it. It's a few months after the election and the fairy tale is over.

(casopisargument.cz/JAV)